Maria Paredes’ two oldest sons—Javier, 17, and Adan, 15—had wonderful experiences attending institutions within the Diocese of Des Moines Catholic Schools, so she figured things would be even better for her youngest son, Leo, when he started kindergarten.
“I thought I was going to give them something better just by putting them in a private school,” the Des Moines resident said. “He’ll have fewer students in his classroom, he’ll be able to raise his hand to say something is wrong with his bowel movements, and it’ll be OK, and as we follow along, the progress should be straightforward.”
While Maria expected school to be as smooth as it had been with her older sons, the difference between Leo, 7, and his brothers—other than the age gap—is that Leo has a medical condition that affects his ability to use the bathroom on his own.
Leo was born with anorectal malformation, a condition that occurs when a baby is born with an anus or rectum that didn’t develop properly, according to the Cleveland Clinic. The cause is unknown, and one out of every 5,000 babies born in the US has it.
Throughout his life, Maria said Leo has had four or five surgeries to treat his condition, coupled with countless procedures and medical appointments, most of which take place out of state where specialists in the condition practice. Leo initially went to the Cincinnati Children’s Hospital in Ohio before switching to Children’s Mercy Hospital in Kansas City so the family could be closer to home.
The Parades manage Leo’s condition through a small button near his belly button that allows him to have bowel movements. Still, it can take up to two hours for him to defecate.
“What I always like to tell people about my son’s reality and what the difference is for his rare condition is that you and I can go to the bathroom; he cannot,” Maria said. “He also has problems with constipation, and that’s something he will deal with for the rest of his life.”
Other than his condition, Maria said Leo is a normal little boy. He loves animals, wants to be like his big brothers, tries to make friends with everyone, and is so obsessed with “Toy Story” that “To Infinity and Beyond” is a regular part of the family’s vernacular and tattooed on Maria’s arms.
“I want him to grow as normal as possible,” she said. “Leo, to me, he’s a great child. He’s strong. He’s been through so many things.”
‘Just see me as a mom’
Leo started kindergarten at St. Anthony’s Catholic School in Des Moines in fall 2023. This was also when Iowa’s Students First Education Savings Accounts (ESA) program, which provides taxpayer dollars to support private school tuition, went into effect.
Maria said before Leo started school, she informed staff multiple times about Leo’s condition. She also brought baby wipes, medicine, spare clothes, and toilet-training diapers in case of an emergency.
However, less than a month into the school year, Maria noticed some problems.
“My son, he was coming back soiled from the school. He was coming back crying,” she said.
Maria complained to Jennifer Raes, then-administrator at St. Anthony’s. She figured they would put Leo on a 504 plan—a plan that takes into account if a student’s physical disability substantially limits one or more major life activities.
Instead, Maria alleges that Raes told her, “‘I don’t have time for this. I don’t have staff for this, and you were supposed to potty train him, and he cannot be here. You need to go.” Maria said she then pleaded with Raes to allow Leo to stay at St. Anthony’s.
“I kept telling her, ‘Don’t look at me as a customer, just see me as a mom. If you kick us out, where am I going to go?’” Maria said.
Further complicating the situation was the fact that Adan, her middle son, also attended St. Anthony, while Javier was a sophomore at Dowling Catholic High School.Other five-year-old private school programs within the diocese were already filled.
Maria said it would not be feasible for her to work and take her sons to and from three separate schools.
“I begged her. I cried. I won’t forget that,” Maria said.
Maria said she was given a deadline of Oct. 2, 2023, to pull Leo from St. Anthony’s.
Before the withdrawal date, Maria said she also reached out to St. Anthony’s business manager and the diocese’s director of multicultural programming in hopes of getting permission for Leo to stay there or at least postpone his dismissal until November after a doctor’s appointment in Cincinnati. She also filed a complaint with the Iowa Office of Civil Rights.
But Maria says her messages to diocese officials went unreturned, and she pulled Leo from St. Anthony’s as requested. He remained out of school for the rest of 2023.
“His Godmother, thank God, was willing to watch him until we found a school,” Maria said.
Jake Shama, the director of marketing and enrollment for the Diocese of Des Moines Catholic Schools, did not respond to Starting Line’s multiple email requests for comment.
‘Be able to move forward’
At the start of 2024, Leo enrolled at Christ the King Catholic School. Maria hoped this would provide a fresh start for her youngest son. Unfortunately for the Paredes, Maria said the same issues followed them to Christ the King.
“The second school did the same thing,” Maria said. “I tried. I met with them. I asked them for the 504, and it went on deaf ears.”
Between the lack of a 504 plan to help accommodate Leo’s condition at school and missed time due to various out-of-state medical appointments, emergency room visits, and surgeries, Maria said Leo, who turns 8 in December, is still in kindergarten.
“They just moved him from one classroom to the other,” said Maria, who noted that over two-and-a-half years, Leo has gone from pre-kindergarten to transitional kindergarten to kindergarten despite no cognitive disabilities.
Her frustration led to her pulling Leo out of St. Anthony’s to attend Jefferson Elementary, a public school close to their home in the fall. Maria’s middle son also decided he would leave Dowlining in support, while her oldest son, who will be a senior in the fall, is torn.
Maria said Jefferson’s staff have already told her to expect someone to reach out to her so that they can implement a 504 plan for Leo before the school year starts.
“The fact that he hasn’t even started and they are already offering that kind of support tells me he’s going to be able to move forward,” Maria said.
While Maria said she tried to do everything through the proper channels, her frustrations led her to the legal system. The Iowa Office of Civil Rights issued Maria a right-to-sue letter in October 2025, allowing her to sue St. Anthony’s School and the Diocese of Des Moines
She filed suit against both entities in January, and the case remains ongoing, with a hearing scheduled on Sept. 4
‘We’re not looking for money or anything; we’re looking for change because that’s what really needs to happen,” Maria said. “You are going to charge the money for tuition; there should be some things that every child should be entitled to, no matter their condition, no matter their ability.”
